Helping Real Men Find Real Love -- No Games, No Tricks, No Bullshit

The Power of Thought

Kevin2008 — Fri, 20 Nov 2009 20:17:20 GMT

Lately I have been saying to myself before i get out of bed after listening to my holosync audio program "today something very cool is gonna happen" and guess what things just happen. I mean small things like having a cool conversation with a stranger, getting a call from a close friend and him giving me some great news. I have been doing this for nearl a week now and i feel happier ok i do have my moments i mean this afternoon i got very stressed over something.

When i left the office today i saw this very beautiful girl walking towards me. She stopped smiled at me. I wasnt sure who she was then it dawned on me that i had opened her in a shop 4 months ago and she had walked away felt alittle shit back then.

She asked me how i was I replied i am ok. Now the wierd thing is I continued to gaze into her eyes its like our eyes just locked and there was silence. I touched her hair she smiled and continued to gaze into my eyes. Nothing was said for what seemed like a long time.

Then i opened my mouth and said something but couldnt find the words and said somthing like "do you know what i mean" she replied "no" and giggled.

Anyway we swapped numbers gosh my heart was racing something about her long dark hair and her big brown eyes, the way she looked at me really turned me on.

This is first time in a very long time i got that silent gaze thing from a woman.

Well anyway just wanted to share my experience with you.

Forum: Ask Anything

natural ways to increase testosterone

Kevin2008 — Thur, 19 Nov 2009 16:25:40 GMT

http://www.timinvermont.com/fitness/boosttes.htm

Forum: Health & Fitness

I must be regressing!

PillowFire — Thur, 19 Nov 2009 12:49:17 GMT

Recently, after all of of the girls that were attracted to me at school they seem to be losing the attraction. A girl that I used to recently make out with at lunch in an isolated spot, or other girls that I could get physical with easily, now all seem to be pushing me away. "Go away, no one wants you" says the girl that I just mentioned this morning. Maybe I am losing sight of the important things. I honestly can't tell what it is that guys at school are doing to hook up with the best girls. The smart, pretty ones. They tell me they just talk to them and ask them out, but I feel as if "asking out" a girl is so "Chodey" to borrow a term from the PUA community. How physical and such should I be? I'm looking for some great female friends as well as a great girlfriend. How do I go about doing this?

Forum: Ask Anything

Cultural Insight

DonTropez — Thur, 19 Nov 2009 03:33:34 GMT

Towards the end of my day off wandering around town (coffee, tea and books) I was approached by this brunette from one of the little isle stands with an amazing energy I can't really describe, she's from Israel, north border with Lebanon, and while she held my hand trying to playfully convince me into a manicure, she told me about her country, her commute a whiles away and her Hello Kitty debit card... and she helped me reinforce my desire to travel the world, which has been a project for almost a year now.

Women from such diverse places have such a different filter on life than the latest Fake-Reality Show and celebrity gossip, or how to manipulate men and themselves in the illusion to form an american-dream family rather than fulfill their dreams and passions.

I love all women, but I'm loving foreign ones just a little bit more now

Forum: Other Topics

Are College Girls Different Than "Real" Women?

ledAstray — Wed, 18 Nov 2009 20:46:11 GMT

Hey guys,

I was just asking myself if all the stuff you teach on LVo3 is really suitable for the college girls in their early 20s. I feel like they are basically still little girls that don't need the whole "let's be real" or "let's cut the bullshit and talk like adults" kind of thing, but just want to have fun and check out what fits them best.

Can you agree with that or am I just missing the "deep" college students out there?

Forum: College/University

I'm too into the wrong girl

boweja — Wed, 18 Nov 2009 07:51:42 GMT

I'm getting back into the dating game, and doing, well, pretty decent. The last 3 weeks have been something of a whirlwind of romance for me.

However, there is a problem. There are two principal local love interests of mine. One is really into me, consistently tells me I'm the most awesome fabulous guy ever, is my 'wife' and I her 'husband' (because we make a killer team at household related stuff...ie, we throw a damn good party!), and we just click. Things are going slowly as I'm sort of de-friendzoning her in my mind. I think she's fabulous, though, and I'm satisfied with the direction our relationship is taking.

Then there's another girl. I met her maybe a month ago. I asked her out to coffee around 3 weeks ago (second time I hung with her and a group of friends). We went to coffee. It went great. We ended up at my place fooling around. She really wanted sex. I was pretty content to take things slow. I like romance, buildup, and anticipation.

Two days after the fact, she was in what was labeled an exclusive relationship with someone else for...around 5 days. Then, I get a text from her telling me she's available again due to some complications and would like to have some fun. I'm kind of ambivalent, but we set something up. We meet the day before our next scheduled time together at a party...we end up making out on the couch (yet again) for the last hour of the party or so.

The next day, she shows up wayyy late -- sort of. She was supposed to hit my place for some teriyaki and fun with friends, then stay a bit late. She ended up coming about 2 hours after I told her the thing started. My friends left 20 minutes later. I was kind of pissed, but she was just disarmingly charming and fun. We stayed behind and fooled around in the shower and talked.

The situation is actually complicated as hell. We have hugely overlapping social groups, and she gets around quite a bit (though as I understand it, she's at least physically much more forward and involved with me than most). However, she seems entirely emotionally inaccessible to me. I have friends who she has known half as long as she's known me, who get texts which basically tell them how awesome they are as people.

I get lots of physical attention and, well, we're leading up to some awesome sex. But I want to be appreciated as a person. Which I'm just not feeling at all. The bottom line is, she switches back and forth from pushing all the right buttons physically, and pushing all the wrong buttons socially, and it makes me feel pretty crappy.

If you made it through that entire post...THANKS FOR LISTENING.

If any older and wiser heads would be willing to give me some perspective and advice, I'd appreciate it in a huge way.

Forum: Confessions

I Bought a Pickup Product

ledAstray — Mon, 16 Nov 2009 19:55:42 GMT

Hey guys,

Thought I had to share this little story with you. Recently I came across a product that kinda catched my eye. I thought I would never buy any product from the community again, but it was basically just shipping I had to pay (around 10 bucks). So anyway, even though the money investment was minimal, I had buyer's remorse directly after. I thought "damn, now I gave away my credit card information for something I don't need". Anyway, we'll see what is going to happen, if they are going to charge me something I didn't order or things like that.

What I wanted to share though is something different. I wanted to show you how bold pickup companies these days are.

So I ordered the "free" product, I read everything three times to make sure I didn't overlook someone. Of course the free product comes with a "cancel within 30 days" subscription to an online bootcamp. No big deal, that's what's cancellation is for, right? What happened next? Before I could check out I was sent to a page for a super-exclusive-once-in-a-lifetime offer for a product about reducing approach anxiety. Of course I didn't read the long ass sales page because I got sick of them. So I naturally scrolled down and down away from the fat "BUY NOW1!!!!!1!111!" buttons just to see a tiny, little text at the bottom saying "No, I don't want to eliminate approach anxiety in my life and continue to feel afraid of approaching women" (not the original text, but something along those lines. I hit this button and come to the next page. It offers me another product I don't remember for just $179. Incredible right? Again I scroll down to find a text link about not wanting the most out of my dating life bla bla and whatnot.

Now here comes the real kicker: I pressed the link to come to the next page and you know what? A page appears selling me THE EXACT SAME THING for $100 off. The text on the page said something like "We're sorry we didn't meet your criteria. This is your final chance to get this offer for $100 off".

I had to laugh real hard and just thought to myself "fuck you, assholes!". I mean seriously, how bold and fucked up is that? Would you buy a product from a company knowing you could get it for less with a bit of resisting at first? I mean this is online business and not face-to-face advertisement.

Forum: Confessions

DAYGAME PRIMER

Keychain — Mon, 16 Nov 2009 19:07:34 GMT

DAYGAME PRIMER

Game with the lights on

Introduction

If meeting women in the daytime is something youre interested in then this primer is for you. It contains the basic information on daygame that I present at most bootcamps I instruct at. In my opinion, this is what you need to know to get out there and start meeting people outside of a nightclub environment.

Without further ado, lets get into the practical meat of the primer

Opening

I find the greatest consistency and satisfaction using direct openers such as:

Excuse me, I saw you from over thereand Id regret it all day if I didnt come met youbecause you look absolutely gorgeous(EXTEND HAND TO SHAKE) Hi, Im Keychain, whats your name?

Direct openers like this (recently popularized by Sebastian Drake, Soul, Dr.Yen etc) usually open quite strongly and provide a good platform for you to launch the conversation from. At the very least, its nice to say nice things to people itll make you feel good and give her positive emotions too.

In some circles, it is said that direct openers require more balls than indirect openers. It is usually unclear to which balls they are referring, although it is unlikely to refer to the size/volume of the PUAs anatomy (I suspect it has something to do with courage and successful risk taking).

The virtues of direct opening aside, theres nothing wrong with starting a conversation in another style such as indirect, functional, comedic etc There are lots of examples of these types of openers online and youll want to come up with your own as the situation dictates. Here are a few to get you started:

- Hey do you know where the nearest Starbucks is?

- Shes reading a book: What are you reading?

- Shes wearing head/earphones: What are you listening to? Im bored of my current playlist (credit Sasha) take her ipod and start teasing/appreciating her playlist (my addition).

- Shes in a shop or coffee house, deliver with comedy: I saw you from out there and had to come meet you. I just couldnt let a pane of glass stand between us and true love. (Credit Sasha)

If the girl is sat or stationary, you can just walk over to her and deliver your opener. If shes moving, Ill always approach from behind, even if it means letting her walk past to get my angle.

To stop a moving set, approach from behind and touch the inside of the elbow gently with two fingers. You can also touch the tricep area or the back of the forearm. Say excuse me to get her attention, stop walking as she turns towards you and then deliver your opener.

To further stop her forward momentum and start the transition to conversation, extend your hand to shake hers. Give your name and ask for hers. She will, as most people would, automatically shake your hand and give you her name. From here, youre ready to transition.

A Common Trap With Direct Openers

A life of reaction is a life of slavery, intellectually and spiritually. One must fight for a life of action, not reaction. Rita Mae Brown

Dont try to solicit a reaction. So many guys get addicted to the big, gushing reactions that you will occasionally get from your direct approaches and look for it every time. Instead of being an expression of their personality and core intent, the direct opener becomes a tool to chase a reactionthey deliver it and wait for the big WOW! Its approval-seeking and not attractive.

Try this frame: Her beauty/vibe/aura moved you to approach. Something in your core just said yes. So youre going to go meet her, express your core and see if shes the kind of girl you might connect with and would like in your life. Self-expression, without the need for approval, mixed with a curious fascination for her as a unique creature.

Transition to Conversation

After opening, I like to stack and cycle through the following transition material until I find a topic that youre both interested in and can naturally talk about together (what Sebastian Drake calls a click topic). Perhaps you both enjoy traveling or you both like the movies of a certain director.

To that end, here are three content-questions that you can ask to mine for a click topic.

1)What are doing in London/Oslo/Melrose today? (this also allows you to find out how much time you might have to talk. If shes rushing to meet friends, better go for the number. If shes just shopping, you might try for an instant-date later in the conversation)

2)What do you do for a living?

3)What do you do for fun?

As recommended by Wayne Elise, these can either be delivered statement/question or question/statement. In other words, you might start by talking about what youre doing in central London and then ask her what shes up to (statement/question). Or you might ask her first and then answer your own question when shes done (question/statement). Either way, be prepared to supply the initial content and energy of the interaction.

Its not unusual for a person to be a little on-guard when approached by a stranger in the street or a coffee shop and give quite short answers. Allow her initial shyness, shell warm up as your statements build comfort and convey your attractive personality.

Another conversation technique I enjoy is to talk about a character trait I enjoy, explain why I enjoy it and then ask her if she has it. I came up with this by combining Mr.Ms ideas about high-value frame attraction and Sebastian Drakes click topics. This soft qualification is a great way to add value to a conversation and qualify in a high-value way. The more astute among you may recognize some sexual framing in this material also. Lately Ive been teaching this at a lot of bootcamps and the results have been so encouraging that I recommend you add this technique to your arsenal.

For example:

I really like people who travel, I love to travel myself. Theres something about people who traveltheres an open-mindedness to new experiences and a non-judgemental quality that I really like. Do you like to travel?

I like to surround myself with creative people. They have an energy and a fresh way of looking at life that really energizes me. What do you do for fun?

If you cant find a click topic, consider that perhaps the two of you have nothing to click on and are better off moving on to meet other people. With practice, however, youll find you can find a way to connect with almost anyone you meet. Remember to listen with curiosity and interest.

Thoughts on Conversation

Id suggest focusing on glimpsing the girl underneath her social facade and being open enough for her to get a glimpse of you under yours.

Its easy to view interactions with girls as a game in which you say certain things, touch your target in a certain way to either win or lose the game. This kind of thinking serves to dehumanize the girl who is, after all, a unique person just like you. What if the simple meeting of both of your personalities, opinions and experiences could provide enough content for an attractive, successful conversation?

Dont forget to be fun and humorous. Tease a little to inject some spice, have fun with the conversation. Theres no need to be intense and serious all the time in fact, this can be quite creepy! Try a fun role play or future projection, experiment with attraction materials. Beware of making these the focus of your content though, remember that you and her are enough to have a great conversation.

Find your own style of interaction. When you meet a man who is successful with girls, by all means copy his style but only to gain an understanding of the underlying principles that make him so successful. Dont be a clone, youll get much better results as a great version of you.

Taking Things Further

Where can you take the conversation after youre clicking and enjoying one another? Depending on the logistics of the situation, you might try these options:

- suggest a future meeting and exchange contact details.

- suggest going to get a coffee right then and there.

- my first daygame approach ended with a hand job in a nearby photo-booth. You could shoot for this if the mood strikes.

Conclusion

The skill of meeting people and having great conversations is a vast one with room for a lifetime of learning and experimentation. Its a lot of fun and comes with lots of benefits, not least all of the beautiful women youll meet!

With this basic information youve got all you need to start meeting girls in the daytime. The most important thing you could do with what youve read is start applying it in real conversations.

Good luck,

Keys

Forum: The Roaring 20's

Talking About Self Improvement With Others

ledAstray — Mon, 16 Nov 2009 13:19:47 GMT

Hey guys,

Recently I was talking to a female friend of mine and sometime during the conversation the topic of Warsaw came up. I said I'd go there for a workshop. When she asked me what it was all about I paused, blushed and all I could say was "it's about relationships. I know that sounds weird right now, but I'll tell you all about it when I come back."

That's it. I didn't want to lie to her and tell her it was a rhetoric seminar or something, but I sure as hell didn't have the balls to tell the whole story either. The thing is though: I have no problems talking about sex, but I don't feel comfortable talking about what I'm doing to get in touch with my masculinity. I need to know the other person will understand before I can open myself up fully. That's why I had no problems telling my mother everything since I know she understands, supports and admires me for my willingness to improve myself.

How is that working out for you guys?

Forum: Ask Anything

Girl behind desk, smile talk -> no smile

James — Sun, 15 Nov 2009 23:28:07 GMT

Hello fellas!

Sometimes I see a girl stand behind the desk smiling and looking at me, on my way up to buy something, then when I say what I want to buy her smile goes a little away.

Just something I feel before and after what I want to buy when looking at her.

Strange...

//James

Forum: Ask Anything

Sometimes saying nice things to your ex helps

vboy123 — Sun, 15 Nov 2009 20:48:32 GMT

TOday I spend over 7 hours of the evening chatting online to my ex girlfriend. We talked about all the moments we spend together (her boyfriend-long term is in the other room). Then she did something that took me by suprise. In fact I never knew she had felt like that with me. This feeling inside me really got me going. She wrote down a full page which she extracted from her diary when we were together and that changed my doubts about how she felt for me. "And now Im lying in my bed.. I can smell him, and I can nearly still feel his lips and his tongue.I hope I will not get any more feelings for him than I already have. "

And then she said she was falling for me at that time. I never knew this was going on in her head cos she was all sturn and acted the least interested in me.

So bottom line, be honest with ur girl if u want her to stop acting or playing games with u. You need stop playing with her to get the real truth disclosed to u..

Forum: Relationships & Sex

The Worst Sexual Experience of My Life

Toniy — Sun, 15 Nov 2009 00:41:41 GMT

Gentlemen, you're in for a long one... but if you've got a few minutes I PROMISE you that you'll get a kick out of this

I spent a week in Malia in June, which is either in, or near, or around Crete, which I believe is the largest of the Greek islands.

And if it isn't, then bear in mind I never claimed to be even remotely adept with Geography... but despite that I always seem to end up discussing Geography with a cute girl... horrendously, but always with enthusiasm

I went away with 6 of my best friends (all guys, all aged 21-23)... so you can imagine the kind of 'holiday' that it was intended to be. Although it should probably be pointed out that I was the only completely single gent on our little excursion.

Jonny: 2.5 Year Relationship 98% Faithful

Danny: Rekindling Relationship with an ex-girlfriend of a couple years or so 100% Faithful until the end (after being falsely accused several times of cheating!)

Mark: 5 Year Relationship - Pretty certain he has a dirty little secret

James: 6-Week trial separation from a 5 Year Relationship Habitually Unfaithful

Lee: Short Term Generally not entirely faithful

Dave: Engaged 100% Faithful

I haven't written anything for a while and my creative juices are starting to flow again... so sit back and enjoy

(Of course if you just want to laugh your impatient ass off then jump to the second post ...)

I wanted to label this as a 'Success Story' (despite not actually penetrating any vagina with my penis ) for reasons that will become clear as the story progresses. This isn't a 'Field Report' as such... just an account of what happened... and a story to tell But instead, weve gone for Sex and Relationships... because I think thats where the lesson lies.

This was basically the first time Id been able to really put everything Ive learned and developed over the past couples of years or so into place... the rest of my time had been spent at university, reading, writing, working, working out and talking to you sons-a-bitches

If you enjoy the story, then I'm ecstatic... if you learn something, then that's even better

The 'chapters' are more individual summaries of the key people that I spent time with on holiday... and the lessons Id learned or realisations that Id made.

So with that, let's get into it

JONNY

Possibly the most naturally attractive man in the world

I've moved over to join him in Swansea. He got promoted at his restaurant and he's managed to get me a job there as a waiter.

I was considering door-work but his argument was simple:

"It's fun, it can be hard work, the pay is minimal, the view is wonderful, the atmosphere is terrific, the girls are cute, cute girls work there, cute girls eat there, and when you go out in town you get recognised... it's the best possible way to get established."

We share, it seems, the exact same philosophies and understandings of women, and much of life... many evenings and lazy afternoons were spent in the sun, smoking, drinking water (trust me, beer WAS out of the question)... just reviewing some of the observations we had made.

So Jonny was like a mentor to me... though younger and fortunately he is quite aware of why hes so good with women when asked about specifics, hes an insightful fella... and it made me realise just how natural what we learn here is... I talk to him about women the same way I do with you guys, and bear in mind he has had no formal education on this stuff like we do. Which is lovely

And being able to keep up with him, and work together (wing) with him, over the course of the week felt like a real achievement for me. Although... he has been in a committed relationship for two and a half years

Being with Jonny (I only got to see him a couple times a year if that) really made me realise how much progress can accelerate when you've got a friend with the same kind of mindset as you do, alongside you.

DAVE

Dave is a very unique character. Think of him as 'The Happy Wanderer'. He's as content spending time with himself as he is with others. He'll occasionally find himself in the most bizarre of sexual circumstances (a girl that worked in a strip club took him around the corner of a bar once to give him head, while he was getting unsuccessfully robbed... for example).

Dave is also engaged to be married. 100% Faithful. Full of surprises. His unrelenting faith and confidence in who he is, is truly inspiring. Even if at first glance you'd think he was a redneck

JENNY AND TANJA

Jenny and Tanja are my new Bavarian girls

I met them on the first night... it was actually Dave and his genuine, hapless charm that drew them into conversation. He went off on one of his wanders and ended up talking to them at the bar. I walked up because I knew Dave was engaged and I also knew that I wasnt

Jenny, Ill be honest, looked like how I think my ideal girl would look. Black hair, slight in build, shorter than me. Tanja was blonder, and curvier, but both were very pretty I remember, and very funny.

What grabbed me about them was how much fun I was having talking to girls that didnt speak much English! It was incredible! Trying to explain words, phrases, cute little mistakes... When Tanja grabbed my face and said Toniy... speak... slow...er!

And teaching Jenny the difference between hug and cuddle

The accent was such a turn on

So the evening progressed and Jonny joined the party as Dave left. As the girls would go off on a Bavarian rant (Im later told by Mark that I should be saying German because apparently thats where it is ), Jonny and I would discuss logistics

So we walk them back to our apartment to drink a little more and talk a little more. Now Jenny was in the beginning, my original target... but that was one element of the situation that I hadnt spoken to Jonny about. Fortunately though I was having a great time talking to Tanja, so it made little difference in the end.

I bring up the subject of where are you staying tonight? (a fantastic transition question by the way ) and invite them to stay with us. They go off on another Bavarian rant, but Im also aware of Jonnys situation. So I ask him, shall we ask if they want us to walk them back? and he replies no... lets just take them...

... What a pro

So its around 5 a.m. still dark, and we begin the journey back to their hotel.

Tanja has her arm hooked with mine and pressed firmly against her boob... which was awesome and enough to get me going to be honest with you gents

I didnt realise of course that there was a REASON that the girls kept saying you dont have to walk us back... it wasnt last minute resistance it was basic human consideration... because it was a LONG FUCKING WALK!!

Put it this way... when we left, it was dark and when we got there, it was light. Id also started to chaff mildly

As another Bavarian rant begins, Jonny says to me Toniy... Ive got a moral dilemma..., to which I respond Yeah I can imagine.

Our plan for the evening consisted of well just let things play out and see how things go. As things were going... we were staying at their hotel.

So I said to him Jonny, well get them to their hotel... and well go back.

I adore his girlfriend and I know how much he loves her. I knew he wouldnt make a mistake, but I also didnt want to put him in an uncomfortable situation of either:

a) Having to make excuses and leaving (its not his strong point)

b) Sitting quietly while I have my fun

So we got to the hotel. Eventually, after walking miles through Greek wilderness, skeletons of buildings and a graveyard... we got to the hotel

We sit at the gate for a while, trying not to alert the attention of any security, and I lay on the floor in mock exhaustion. Tanja sits next to me and I pull her over me (she wouldnt straddle unfortunately... or perhaps fortunately I never did decide...) and we kiss. We sit up and I crawl over her, between her legs so she has to lean back and she tells me Toniy... no more... and I retort One more kiss....

But shes a smart girl... Yes, yes... one kiss and then two kiss and three kiss...

Well ideally, yeah

We kiss again and I kiss her neck, bite her a little (Im a biter ) and she moans some... but then I realise... I need to nip this in the bud before I get carried away. As though I hadnt already

So I back off... with a groan... and stand up... looking at my groin with a forlorn expression on my face. I turn to Jonny and tell him we should go now. The girls start to walk to their rooms and I adjust myself. I hear them laughing. I didnt think they saw. Or maybe I just didnt care anymore

I sent Tanja a text once Id gotten back to England. She text me her email address yesterday so weve kept in touch.

They are two very, very cool girls. The highlight of my holiday. But also the cause of my Blue Balls for the rest of the fucking week

Forum: Relationships & Sex

Cocky & Funny sucks.

Hammer_Bro — Sat, 14 Nov 2009 12:25:10 GMT

I used it to "create attraction" (in other words, bed girls) since winter 2005 to spring 2009 (That's when I found LVO3). C&F didn't bed jack shit, I just made girls feel insulted, angry and creeped out, plus I felt so unauthentic and weird. In reality I felt bad for blurting out that to girls. During that time I couldn't manage a single cold approach with openers David recommended, not to mention C&F openers. Sean's Spicy & Sweet is WAY better. (It actually works...)

But in the end, there's only me to blame, of course.

Forum: Confessions

Whats the best way...

Derek — Wed, 11 Nov 2009 20:31:22 GMT

Hey guys,

whats the best way to find out if a girl is in a relationship? I was about to see if this girl wanted to come over for dinner but wasn't sure if she had a boyfriend. I feel bad that I let this opportunity slip and don't want it to happen again. Any help would be great!

Peace fellas

Derek

Forum: Ask Anything

I cannot access any of the password forums. SEAN HELP

panatha10 — Wed, 11 Nov 2009 06:10:05 GMT

My username is allowed to login, but i keep putting in the password and it wont let me in the forum. HELP!

Forum: Ask Anything